Irrelevant and Unsubstantiated Predictions – 2017 Edition
It’s Christmas, and we’d like to take the opportunity to make unfounded and irrelevant predictions for the year to come. We’ve put our heads together and come up with the following list based on what we feel are the prevailing trends. Some of them are at least conceivable, some of them are clearly ridiculous. Mostly we just hope that you enjoy reading them and have a lovely Christmas and New Year.
We think 2017 will bring…
- Cloves. In recent years there has been a trend towards all things classic. In a complex and ever-changing World people seem to be drawn to old-timey things, like gin and gramophones. Cloves are a reminder of the bygone era of stewed apple, sweets in jars and hooped skirts. With their distinctive flavour and versatility, cloves could be 2017’s top culinary tip.
- Personalised clothing. People are working harder than ever on developing their personal brands and with technology developing as it is, there’s no reason for this not to extend into customised clothing. Expect custom printed garments, clothing based on 3D scans of the wearer’s body and QR codes that link to the wearer’s social media platforms.
- The closest most people get to wearing armour is wearing shinpads, but for various reasons people feel obliged to take them off once the game’s over. Game of Thrones and the trend toward personal branding will work together in 2017 to bring proper armour back, after several hundred years on the sidelines. Smaller items will be the first to hit the high street, with full breastplates and helmets to come later.
- People wearing VR headsets in public. The rise of virtual reality is going to be a bonanza for the app makers, but it’s going to look very weird seeing people wearing enormous goggles everywhere you go. The sight of everybody on the train staring blankly into their phones is already a challenge to the civic sense – now imagine you can’t even see their faces and they’re all clutching their belongings to their chests in case someone steals them.
- Tea Houses. Millennials love photo opportunities and they drink less alcohol than any other generation. A Tibetan style tea house, with the mindfulness atmosphere that comes with it, is the perfect environment for the modern consumer to spend an afternoon drinking overpriced tea and Instagramming themselves. #Contemplative.
- Political tattoos. In an increasingly customisable World, demand is growing for anything that makes it easier to sieve people out of your life before you’ve wasted any time speaking to them. With a simple collection of logos tattooed onto your hand you could immediately tell people what your views are on the current hot-button issues. The build-up of tattoos over the years will create a kind of overlapping collage that will be a physical representation of the various positions the person has taken over the years. Hours of small talk could be saved in this way, freeing people up to go brunching with people they already like and agree with.
- Like Tibet, camping is positioned for the mindful consumer. As wages continue to stagnate and people finally tire of Majorca, the perfect storm of circumstances is going to mean a big windfall for the camping supplies industry. Expect sales of sleeping bags, little red stoves and nature-proof makeup to be buoyant in 2017.
That concludes our list of things that may or may not happen in 2017. While we can’t guarantee that we’ll be writing next year’s predictions from a Tibetan teahouse wearing 3D printed chainmail trousers, we can say with reasonable certainty that we’ll still be working hard to help our clients get their messages to where they need to be.
Merry Christmas from everybody at the Cadence Team!
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